They’re not escalators, as you seem to think; they’re human rocket launchers.
The government want to turn us all into rocket fuel and blast us into space.
Its an unprecedented step towards population control, a conspiracy on the grandest scale.
This was my first attempt…
“That’s what you brought me here to show me? Some escalators?”
“Ah ha ha, but that’s where you’re wrong! They are cleverly disguised as escalators but they’re actually anything but. They’re rocket launchers, they are. They’re gonna launch rockets from them. We’re going to be the rockets. It’s all in their grand plan.”
“No, they’re not. They’re just escalators. Sorry Paranoid Pete, but you’ll never convince me that you’re right about the government conspiracy to turn us all into rockets. You really ought to stop taking those dodgy pills, ya know.”