Friday Feels…Exhausted: Fortifying Battlements When Everything Goes Tits-Up

Friday feels…phew! Exhausted.

I’ve had a really crappy week this week. I mean, super crappy. Possibly the worst week of my life – at least, one of them. Family stuff, stuff that’s inescapable. All families row, right? This was a biggie. My family rows are normally done and dusted by the next morning but this one went on for four days and I was worried it would never get sorted out. I thought that was it. It’s all sorted now – we’re friends again and we’ve got a plan, so that’s awesome – although I’m totally and utterly exhausted! It’s no-one’s fault and everyone’s fault – like rows always are – and I know everyone feels the same as me but still…it was tough.

The thing is, when something like that hits you, is that it effects everything in your life,

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Attention seeking Hornet

doesn’t it? It sends ripples in every direction, a sonic boom that blasts everything out of its way and makes sure you’re paying attention. Look at me, I’m here. Forget everything else and just get pissed. Even Confidence and Paranoia haven’t had much of a look-in, although I did hear the odd shout of glee from Paranoia.

 

“Haha! Told you so! You can’t do this writing lark, there’s too much other stuff going on. You’re such a failure,” he said. Confidence just sulked in the background – weaselly Confidence.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not telling you this so you’ll feel sorry for me, or as some sort of therapeutic technique (all added bonuses though 😉 ). I do have a point. With all this going on, and my brain refusing to function on a normal level, I figured I had to do something.

So I started to develop effective methods of blocking stuff out so that I could be at least vaguely productive if nothing else, and although it wasn’t 100% successful, I’d say I did a pretty good job. My book may have been shelved and my editing lost in the ether, but I did manage to carry on with my blog and I even did a chirpy Facebook Live for Bookshop Bistro. I’ve even scheduled a bunch of posts, and that’s nearly unheard of for me. Now that everything’s back to normal (or as normal as they can be), it’s time to drag my manuscript out, grab my bright pink pen, and start scribbling again, because I’m back – and nothing can stop me now.

death-159120_960_720.pngIn truth, trying times are sent to help us fortify our battlements. The wall I built, whilst it didn’t shield me entirely from the blast range, it got a little bigger and a little stronger. And the next time something crappy happens (because this is life, and crappy things happen in life sometimes), I’ll be able to withstand a little more of the boom, and I can build an extra layer or two. Who knows, by the time death comes for me, perhaps my fortress will be strong enough to block out any blast!

(Hey…does that mean I’d get to block him out too and live forever??)

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